It was a popular lesbian fitness instructor in the US who first gave the Swedish couple the idea of freezing Karina’s eggs. And while that process was quite easy, it’s illegal in Sweden for one partner to carry the other partner’s eggs—which is what they had hoped to do.

Traveling to the US, their first IVF procedure resulted in their daughter, Bonnie. But two years later, and after an unsuccessful attempt at conceiving a sibling, they’re giving it one last chance.

CHRISTINA

She calls us ‘Mama’ with—and then the first name. So, well, our nickname, really. So I’m Mama Kiki. My name is Christina, and I’m called Kiki.

KARINA

Yes. And my name is Mama Akka, but we’re both ‘Mama’.

CHRISTINA

Yeah. But we’re both—

KARINA

Well, ‘Mommy’ sort of.

CHRISTINA

We met in school. You don’t call it school. University.

KARINA

Yes, university.

CHRISTINA

In the nursing school.

KARINA

We live in a house—

CHRISTINA

A big house.

KARINA

A big house, and we have a really big yard. We have about 30 or 40 apple trees.

CHRISTINA

We like it in the countryside.

KARINA

I wanted children earlier, I think.

CHRISTINA

Yeah.

KARINA

You know, when my little sister got children, and I felt like, “Oh, I should have had a child.” But then you weren’t ready.

CHRISTINA

No, I don’t think I was. If you get kids, then you have to answer all these questions, and you have to face people’s reactions, and you have to be really sure that you—I don’t know—I just wasn’t ready. And then one day, I was.

KARINA

We actually saw something on TV, that—

CHRISTINA

Jackie, Jackie Warner.

KARINA

Jackie Warner, actually, that she was going to save the eggs.

CHRISTINA

Yes.

KARINA

And then we thought that—and I don’t know if she talked about it, but then we came up with the idea, if one donates the egg to the other one.

CHRISTINA

I think we had that idea before, but we didn’t know how to go about it, how to do it. We didn’t know where. I mean, in Sweden, you can’t do it. It’s not legal. So it was—we had the idea, and we just didn’t know how to do it. And then we saw that.

KARINA

Kristina was going to work, and I was going to log in, and make that we could get in touch with some donor agency. And I found a donor agency where we could get a story about them. They were talking on a video. We had pictures. And we had a lot of information. The first thing I logged into, it was this guy. And I went, “It’s him. This is—this is him.”

CHRISTINA

Everybody at my work cried when I told them. “Ohhh,” they were so happy. “Ohhhh.” They were—that I was pregnant. They were just—no, they’ve been very accepting.

KARINA

Yes, they have. And they are really happy for our sake.

CHRISTINA

And Sweden is kind of—Sweden is a good, good country.

Sweden is kind of far ahead, I think. And my mother didn’t understand when I was—I gave her the ultrasound pictures. “Oh, this is your new grandchild.” “Are you buying a dog?”

She was like, “What?” She didn’t at all get it. And then she’s like, “Oh, oh.” She was so happy. She was very, very happy.

She’s a very happy child. She likes to be outside.

KARINA

And play a lot, yes.

CHRISTINA

Play a lot. She likes animals.

KARINA

She’s never still. She’s never—this is really a very long time for her to sit still.

CHRISTINA

Yeah, this is like the Olympics of sitting still. Really.

A gay couple have been longing for their children for a long time. So of course, children of lesbian, gay couple, they get a lot of love. We’ve waited a long time, and we really, really want our children.

KARINA

And we go to the playground with Bonnie every day.

CHRISTINA

Every morning.

KARINA

Every morning.

CHRISTINA

We’re both mothers. First of all.

KARINA

Yeah, first of all, we are both mothers. And Kristina is the biological mother, and I am the genetical mother.

So it’s my egg, but Kristina was carrying Bonnie.

Dr. KOLB Just a second here. That’s good. So you’re feeling okay.

CHRISTINA

Yes. My ovaries, I’m feeling them more now than I did the first days.

DR. KOLB That’s a good thing.

CHRISTINA

I think so as well.

KARINA

When we contacted Dr. Kolb, he told us that the age matters to the quality of the eggs. And since I’m older, he—

CHRISTINA

Suggested that—

KARINA

Suggested that we should start off with my eggs. If we wanted to switch later, to try the other way.

CHRISTINA

And the plan was really to switch now. But now, we decided that it would be better for Bonnie to have a—how do you call it?

KARINA

Sibling.

CHRISTINA

A sibling, her sibling. So—I’ll carry if this works out.

KARINA

Yes. So we do the same, because we have sperm saved from the same donor, and if you—we use my egg again, then we will have a sibling.

CHRISTINA

So Bonnie was our first. Then we were here six months ago, seven months ago. And that didn’t work out, and now we’re here again. But this will be the last—

KARINA

This is really the last time.

CHRISTINA

It’s all—it’s also a question of money, really, for us, because we come from—I mean, across the—

KARINA

Yeah, it’s not—just the payment for the treatment. It’s the trip, and we work, and stuff, that we have to—

CHRISTINA

It’s a big deal.

KARINA

It’s a big deal.

CHRISTINA

It’s a big thing to do, and it’s a big thing to plan.

KARINA

Plan, yes.

CHRISTINA

You have to—so this is it.

DR. KOLB The uterus here, the endometrium here. So when you’re pregnant, this is where the pregnancy will be. And this is—we’re going to put the embryos right in along here. So this looks really nice. It’s coming in well.

CHRISTINA

We want Bonnie to have a sibling, but it’s—

KARINA

And somebody to share the experience, to have gay parents, maybe, and to have a donor father, and—

CHRISTINA

And just to have a sibling, as well.

KARINA

And—yes.

DR. KOLB Once the follicles reach a mature size, then we can set up the egg retrieval. Okay. So we’re going to check that. And then afterwards, we’ll sit down and go through everything, as far as what our next steps are, and when the retrieval is going to fall.

KARINA

The process is that we are stimulating my eggs.

CHRISTINA

Yes, you’re on egg stimulation. And I started my medication in Sweden already. So I’m on a lot of hormones, I would say. And we go to Dr. Kolb’s—or to the clinic every—

KARINA

Third day, maybe.

CHRISTINA

Third day to do ultrasound and check on the eggs, see how they’re doing. And when, once they’re ready—

KARINA

The plan is to take them out.

CHRISTINA

Yes. Then they’ll come out and—

KARINA

And then fertilize them. So we hope that there will be some eggs, and fertilize them, good enough to put in Kristina.

CHRISTINA

Yes.

DR. KOLB I just wanted to reiterate for you that with the uterus and the lining, it looks excellent. It’s coming in really well. So we’re just going to hold your dose of the estrogen where it’s at now. The lining—

KARINA

But continue—

DR. KOLB Yes.

KARINA

Yes?

DR. KOLB No changes. So, and the fact that you’re responding really well, and you’re going a little bit slower, it’s not going to harm what we see with the lining here. So we’re in a good position, okay.

CHRISTINA

You have very high hopes, and you don’t know if it will work out, or—

KARINA

Yeah. So now we know what we miss out. As soon as we got Bonnie—now we know what it really means.

CHRISTINA

What it means if it doesn’t work out. What we lose, kind of. Had we been a straight couple, we would have had three kids already.

DR. KOLB So they’ll kind of help you on inventory. If we need to order more medications, that’s fine. If you’re running low for today, we can give you medications to continue, so it shouldn’t be a problem. Okay?

CHRISTINA

Are you satisfied with this? Or are you worried?

DR. KOLB I’m satisfied. There are—it’s a little bit of a slower cycle than you’ve had in the past. But once we went up on the dose of your medication, you’re doing fine. So it’s almost like this early part, where you had very little response—it’s almost like those days didn’t exist.

CHRISTINA

Good.

KARINA

It’s good.

CHRISTINA

Good. Yeah. I think it—we feel better now than yesterday.

KARINA

Yeah. We are more positive now than yesterday, because yesterday we were more tense about eggs, if they were growing or not. And today, it’s more positive. Really more positive.

CHRISTINA

And also because there are now 12 eggs. And there were only, what seven—

KARINA

Yeah, he couldn’t see them all…because they were so small. And today, he can count in more eggs, as well, and that’s good, because we had just—

CHRISTINA

And they will keep on growing for a few days, so—

KARINA

So, yes. Some people think that this is really—we just do it—go there, and we have a baby; walk out with a baby. And—

CHRISTINA

We go buy a baby.

KARINA

Yeah. But even—we are quite healthy. We don’t have any fertilization problems that we know of before. Even then, it’s not that good chances. And we hope—

CHRISTINA

But we’re positive.

KARINA

And we are positive.

CHRISTINA

We’re positive.

KARINA

We hope that we go home with a—

CHRISTINA

We have to be positive.

KARINA

With a baby.